Gump Goes To Heaven
day finally arrives: Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven. He is met at
the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself. The gates are closed, however,
and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper. St. Peter says "Well Forrest,
it's ertainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must inform
you that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an
entrance examination for everyone. The tests are fairly short, but you
need to pass before you can get into Heaven. Forrest responds "It
shore is good to be here St. Peter. I was looking forward to this. Nobody
ever told me about any entrance exam. Sure hope the test ain't too hard;
life was a big enough
Peter goes on, "Yes, I know Forrest but the test I have for you is
only three questions. Here is the first: What days of the week begin with
the letter T? Second: How many seconds are there in a year? Third: What
is God's first name?" Forrest goes away to think the questions over.
He returns the next day and goes up to St. Peter to try to answer the
exam questions. St. Peter waves him up and says "Now that you have
had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers".
Forrest says, "Well, the first one how many days of the week begin
with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today
and Tomorrow. The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims "Forrest!
That's not what I was thinking, but.....you do have a point though, and
I guess I didn't specify, so I give you credit for that answer".
"How about the next one?" says St. Peter. How many seconds in
a year?" "Now that one's harder" says Forrest, "but
I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve".